My last fewish post have been a lot of talk.. a lot of blah blah blah de dah.. So now, it is time for LESS TALK, MORE VIDEO
and how about some Random August Pictures:
In the last picture, she is being a bike..?.. or so she said “take a picture of me being a bike”
{Head Up: this is a long post. It jumps around but all has a point. If you want to just read the Mady parts, scroll down to the purple sentences.}
Let me start off by saying, I grew up in church. Going on Sunday mornings, Sunday nights, Wednesday nights, all children's and youth activities, Bible studies, G.A Camps, Passport, Family campouts, Family functions, fall festivals, missions around town, week long mission trips, and anything else in-between. Pretty much, my life was busy with all church things. With this being said, the older I got.. the more I started to resent it. Not God or my beliefs (although my beliefs have “matured” over the years) but when I turned 17, I pretty much stopped going to church. From 18 until about 21ish, I never attended another church. I did go a few times with my mom on Christmas Eve (mainly because the Eve service was so pretty) but I did not indulge myself in learning or studying or even praying very often. I was getting into things, doing my own things, trying to find my place in my life.. although I have never stopped trusting in God, I have questioned things, and the strength of my religion did head downhill for a little bit. (just being honest)
(-why I stopped going to church- mainly the people. I am NOT putting down people that are Baptist.. my family has always been Baptist.. and I am sure you see this with any religion out there.. but.. as I got older, I saw what was really going on. How judgmental they were. The gossip was crazy. Oh, don’t forget.. how they were “Christian” on Sunday’s but come Monday I would see them in public doing the complete opposite of what they were “teaching” or “saying” in Church. I started to pick up on the rudeness and how FAKE people were. Honestly, church is the first place I really realized what “fake” people were. Sad, I know.. With this said, there were a few wonderful people at my old church. I can not name names but I am putting this in here so that the few people that made an impact on my life and stayed close to me and my family regardless of if we were there or not get the credit they deserve. )
Then I became a mom..
I knew I wanted Mady to know God. To trust God. To believe in God. I also knew I wanted her to have God in her heart while being open to other’s beliefs as she got older. She does go to church with the in-laws (thank yall for picking her up every Sunday to take her.. she enjoys it so much) I have spoken about how God loves her from day 1. She has grown up knowing about God’s love, what Easter and Christmas are really about, and praying. Praying before dinner, before bed (most nights), and praying for things like, no bad dreams, or thanking for the day, helping someone feel better.
Then she turned 5, and I started her in a Christian based school. I knew going into it, sending her there, that the school is more structured than other Christian/Private schools. Meaning, I knew they were going to teach their beliefs very openly. This was one reason I chose this school and another reason I was and still am nervous about the school.
It has only been 2 full weeks since she has started PreK-4 .. and oh the questions I have been asked.. the hard part.. how do you put what you know and believe into words that a 5 year old can understand. Again, I want her to be open to other beliefs but at the age of 5, teaching her my beliefs is what matter. I just don’t want push them on her to where she grows up and resents not being taught other things. At the age of 5 I don’t think she should be taught anything else though.
Questions:
What does Baptized mean?
What is a Christian?
When did God create me? Before or after I was a tiny cell in your belly?
How did God create everything out of nothing?
What happens when you make the Devil mad?
Some people want to go to Hell and some people don’t.
The list actually goes on but this gives you an idea of what is going on in my 5 year old’s head. I know I am answering these questions pretty good because the end results of the conversations have been:
Maybe when I am older I can be Baptized. Maybe they can sprinkle water on my head though because I cant go underwater yet. ( oh the way a 5 year olds thoughts work)
I want to be a Christian right now
Making the Devil mad is a good thing
I want to go where God is when I die.
No body loves God more than I do.
Also, these moments make me very thankful for Zak and the rest of my family. Zak has the answers.. he reminds me of his Dad and Mom sooo much when it comes to how smart he really is. You can tell he grew up listening to his parents and what they say about everything and anything. He doesn’t read, he doesn’t watch tv, he just listens to music. So how he knows everything, religious or not.. beats me.. I just give his family the credit.
Now, why I am thankful she is in her school and will more than likely continue in private schools over public schools.
Last night she started telling us that instead of going to Chapel on Friday (today) they were going to watch a movie. She was not sure what the movie was but the teacher gave her a clue.
“they didn’t have kids” that was the clue. Mady looks at Zak and I and says, I think I know what movie it is. The story about God promises a baby to… to.. I forgot their names. They have to leave where they are and they take his Dad and some family with them and they have to sleep on the ground. They ride on Donkey’s and it isn’t Mary and Joseph. A name starts with an “I” I think. Zak guessed Abraham and Sarah. She wasn’t sure so we each grabbed a children's bible from her bookcase and started searching. It was Isaac that she was thinking about and it was Abraham and Sarah. Then I asked her what does her teacher read from, a bible or story books. She tries to explain what her teacher uses because it is neither a bible or book.. it is a thing with pictures and has stories on the back and she changes the pictures. (I still have no idea what she is talking about) then she starts naming off stories..
Mady: you know, Noah’s Ark, the burning bush, Adam and Eve..
Me: wait, you know about the burning bush.. what was that?
Mady: God was talking to him with the burning bush
Zak: do you know WHO he was talking to
Mady: I can’t remember
Zak: Moses
Mady: yea yea! Moses! and she turns the pictures and they have different stories
YAY!! She is learning more than she leads on!! Also, I was reading this post on Facebook from a mom who has preemie baby in the hospital. Her older daughter (I think 7) took 3 things in for show and tell that could fit into a plastic bag. She took her preemie sisters very small diaper, a picture of her sister and then a picture of her being baptized at church. She ends up telling the mom that a lot of kids didn’t know what it was to be baptized and how hard it was her on (the mom) to hear this. She then goes on to say how she was talking with the teacher and the teacher told her that if a child ask about the picture that was brought, she can not answer questions. The kids can answer questions but the teacher can get fired for “teaching” things about religion such as what it means to be baptized.
That right there makes me glad she is in the school she is in. This is why I want her to stay in private school. It is crazy to me when I think that a teacher can get in trouble for this. Mady’s class prays before they eat snack, during the day, and whenever else they want. Her preschool before this was a private church preschool as well and they too prayed or answered questions the kids had. This is how it should be in public school.
When you think about it. They are saying that you can’t teach bible or pray in class. WHY? because that is teaching other kids that don’t believe in the bible or praying, things they shouldn’t be taught? Well, isn’t that the same as teaching the kids that want to pray or have questions that they can’t do that. It is , IT IS, the exact same thing. I think that prayer should be allowed. Not forced. If a child doesn’t want to close their eyes to pray, they should not have to.. they can sit there in silence and color, or whatever. That is fine, but if a child wants to pray in class, on the football field, before a test.. then so be it. FREEDOM right? Freedom to choose if you pray or not. Freedom to choose how you answer a question about religion. (The Pledge should be said every day also)
I mean, think back when I was in school or when you were in school. Did you say the pledge? Did you pray before school started around the flag? Were you able to ask questions and get answers? Did you take a bible class in your public school? How did you turn out? Probably WAY better than these kids are turning out where none of this is allowed. And they wonder why kids are the way they are.. we are teaching them that they can get away with anything. Such as, if one person has a problem with prayer in schools, it is blown up into this entire ordeal and then banned. Honestly it is all bullcrap. Banning prayer and now the pledge because it has “under God” in it. At least (for now) private schools are able to teach, pray, and answer questions. I can’t imagine Mady not doing that in her day to day activities at school. I guess that made my decision about private or public schools for next year. (although you do what you have to do and if private school is not an option, then we will of course embrace all the other options.. just throwing that out there)
Something I have noticed/learned/caught on to/been amazed by while being a mom is how often our children my chica changes. I am not talking about looks because her looks are not noticeable on a daily basis the way her personality or vocabulary is. The past 2 weeks have been busy but one thing I have noticed is her new sayings. She has always had a saying or two that she holds on to or uses for a short time period. Remember whens he would say “ssyea”? Goodness she was little when she started that.
Like I was saying, the past 2 weeks she has changed up her “sayings”
1- I know, right? yes, she does get this from Z and myself. We both say it very often (me more than him I am sure) but it is so funny to hear her say it. Example:
Me- Mady, look at Denver in his dog house
Mady- aww, he is so cute, he loves his dog house
Me- it’s so funny how he flips it over and lays in it
Mady- I know, right?
Mady- mom, watch my handstand
Me- wow! You are getting so good at it
Mady- I know, right?
Mady- it is starting to be fall, did you know that?
Me- yea. its getting to be cool in the mornings.. at least the car wont be hot anymore
Mady- I know, right?
2- I’m just different. This is used as an excuse of how she does things. Example:
Me- Mady you need to eat your dinner instead of playing with it
Mady- I am. I just like to play too
Me- but your not supposed to play with your food. Food is for eating
Mady- I know mom. But I’m just different
Me- Do you like school?
Mady- yes.
Me- are you learning things?
Mady- no, I already know it all
Me- well if you already know it all, at least you are practicing to get better at it
Mady- yea but sometimes I like to do things my way
Me- what do you mean?
Mady- like spelling. you know.. I like to spell things my way cause I’m just different
3- You just don’t understand.. Also known as.. No one understands me.. used when she isn’t getting her way or we are talking about two different things
4- That’s just the way the world is. Example
Me: oh my goodness, this red-light is taking forever
Mady: mom, you know.. that’s just he way the world is
Me: I sure wish you would listen and do what I ask the first time
Mady: yea but.. that’s just the way the world is
Me: bummer, Dad won’t be home for dinner
Mady: aww man. I was wanting to eat dinner with him
Me: I know, me too
Mady: I guess that’s just the way the world is
and the newest.. which she has only said maybe 5 times in the past 2 weeks..
OH SHOOT. I am not sure where she picked this up. It isn’t something I say all the time because I say bummer. I know I have said it though. She uses is correctly but I don’t really like hearing her say it. It could be because, well, lets face it.. it is a polite way of saying oh shit.. and I don’t want her saying that, so maybe in my head I hear it in a non polite way.. I am corrected her and said.. maybe you should say what you use to say.. “aww man” or say “bummer” but I didn’t really give much attention to it thinking hoping it wouldn’t be catchy and stick. As of right now, I don’t think it will stick with her.
Remember this post? Well, as of today, it has officially been 1 week since we met her teacher. (tomorrow marking the one weeks since she started school and marking the one week I cried because .. well, because she is growing up)
So, as of right now, she loves it! I must say, this doesn’t surprise me. Last week the letter of the week was I. This week it is U. The learn about things that start with that letter, they learn and practice how to write the letter (which she says can be boring because she already knows, but.. practice makes perfect and she will keep practicing) They read stories, sing songs, play on the playground, and have snack every day. Speaking of snack..
Me: so, what did you have for snack today?
Mady: Oh, it was those yucky gold fish.. Buuut, I tried them ::insert eye roll:: and you know. They were pretty good I’d say.
Me: what goldfish are you talking about?
Mady: oh you know. The colored ones. I mean, why do they have to go an put color on food. It if fine like it is. They were good though. They were green, red, you know.. THOSE
Me: oh! yea.. I know what your talking about.
Mady: did you know they are good?
Me: no.. I had no idea. I don’t really ever eat goldfish
Mady: well see mom, you can learn things from me if you would just listen
Remember how in this post I told you about Mady being upset because other kids wouldn’t listen? Yea, that is still going on! At dance class, a little girl in her class at school is also in her class at dance. Actually the little girl sits across from Mady. Her mom was telling me how they play together and how they are both quite and shy and listen to the teacher. Then she tells me about another little boy that was “uncontrollable” today. (ironic this is this little boy’s name is the same name as the little boy in her preschool class last year that was “uncontrollable”. So although I am not telling you the name of the little boy out of respect for other kids and parents, note that I will never name my child or allow my friends/family to name their child the same name as the “uncontrollable” boys. Anyways, I asked Mady about the little boy today and what all happen. So she tells me
Mady: oh yea, he wasn’t very good today.
Me: what happen? What did he do
Mady: he screamed at the teacher lots of times. He scratched a girl. He wouldn’t listen. He cried all day long.
Me: oh no. What did your teacher do?
Mady: she made him go from green to yellow to red. Then she wrote a letter to his mom and dad and she even had to call his dad so he could talk to him… and if he ripped something, his dad would come and get him and have to spank him
Me: your teacher told him that in front of the class?
Mady: yea, cause he was talking to his dad. But he calmed down. then it was time to go play and he screamed at her again and then he calmed down
Me: yikes.. well, if I were you.. I would stick to being friends with the little kids that are like you. The ones that listen and do what they are told. The ones that are quite and stay on green. I wouldn’t be friends with a person that scratches or misbehaves like that.
Mady: yea. I am friends with the girls that are good. You know what though, just because your friend does something doesn’t mean you have to. We read Adam and Eve and learned that you don’t have to do what everyone else is doing.
Goodness, who are the parents of these kids? I really don’t understand how a child thinks it is ok to act that way to another adult. A teacher. or just period how it is allowed. It has to be allowed in the home for a child to be confident in acting like that else where. I am not judging, I do not have a clue what that child or family is going through.. Maybe the little dude just needs a hug.. but with my child in that class.. I hate that she has to “deal” with it
On a good note: Mady loves it! Drop off is great. Her going half a day is perfect. While I do still have questions and concerns of is this the right place for her to be in this year, or what is she going to learn and believe from a religious point of view, or how is our beliefs in religious and other people and the world going to differ with what she is being taught at school, or do they handle things the way I would handle them, My list goes on.. I am ok with where she is at. I have met some nice people and I truly think her teacher (being only a week in so this is always subject to change) is perfect for my chica. I am looking at this with open eyes, ears, and an open heart. I will do my best to embrace Mady and her school, be involved with her school, and encourage her to learn what she is being taught. I can not say if she will stay there next year. My plan from the beginning was for her to only be there for preK 4. So Z and I could make some big decisions about life in the next year before we have to decide where she starts K and continues her schooling. Right now, for us in this moment, the school feels right (for the most part) and I am sure I will have questions and concerns but I also think that would come from any school/students/teachings that she goes to.
It is weird being a parent of a “school child” or of a “student” . It isn’t anything like the past 4 years even while she was in preschool. She was still small, it was easy, it was mine and Z’s way 24/7. No worries, no doubts.. Now.. well now it has all changed and it makes me feel.. weird.. and slightly excited. All in all, I am HaPpY. I enjoy hearing about her day (what little of it I can pull out of her) and I see that she loves it. If nothing comes from this year (how could she not learn something though?) at least the experience of school, car lines, other kids that are not well behaved and the ones that are well behaved, sitting and doing work, following directions, and not all play, will be enough for me. {UNTIL NEXT YEAR} This is going to be one interesting year!
Side Note: I do want to say that just because Mady’s view on what happens in class or with the teacher or any other child doesn’t mean that is exactly what happen. I am in no way putting the teacher or other children on blast for how they act. I am just simply stating what Mady has told me.
As you know from my last post, my chica boo is now a 5 year old. There is no chance of her being small again. There is the beautiful girl that no longer looks like a toddler, doesn’t have the round chubby baby face she once use to look at me with, her eyes no longer tell me that everything I do makes her the happiest girl in the world, and she no longer fits into just one of my arms as I carry her. She knows what she wants and I am not always doing right by her eyes. She states her opinion and tells me that she knows better than me. It takes both hands/arms to carry her and really I could use about 2 extra hands to help out. Her face is not chubby although her thighs still have some meat (thank goodness) that I can squeeze.
My point is, she is growing up… fast! We really struggled with what to get her this year. A chore chart was the for sure present but what else? She not only has everything but I buy her things during the year that she wants. I could not figure out the perfect gift. After talking and thinking and talking some more, we decided to take her to the toy store and let her pick out a present instead of us picking it out. It was perfect and she got exactly what she wanted! Lets skip backwards a few hours to when she first woke up:
Wake up Time!
Every year I take a photo of her sitting in the bed first thing in the morning on her birthday:
This year I wanted to do some cool birthday breakfast. I actually didn’t prepare for it the night before like I should have because I was out celebrating my best friend graduating from x-ray school! We did decorate the kitchen for her and she loved what I came up with to eat:
Birthday Pan-CAKE
(simple, just add food coloring to the batter and cook! Then I took a round cookie cutter to cut the size I was wanting/made them all even) She had 5 layers for being 5 years old)
Of course me being the mom I am and not wanting to waste perfectly good food, I ate the last picture that looks like a mess.. It was the ends to her cake .. they were just as good as any of the other pancakes! (Just not pretty)
Present Time:
Like I said, we were not sure what to get her but we did have a few little things for after breakfast. Beanie babies (from my moms garage, they use to be my sister’s and mine) and the chore chart! Which is amazing by the way. Thank you Mellissa and Doug for never disappointing us with your toys! After present time, her and dad played paper dolls.
Lets go shopping:
That is what we did. We headed out to Toysrus. Although she ended up wanting to go to target to get her present, it was nice walking around toysrus watching her try to make up her mind about what the best toy would be. Needless to say, it was a hard decision.
{proud parents of a 5 year old}
This is Jessica Ann, she is much much prettier in person
Lunch Time:
When we asked her what she wanted to do for lunch, she decided on pizza. A picnic at home with pizza, ranch, and a slushy. So that is exactly what we did!
As we were sitting there, I noticed something very odd. So odd that I just had to take a picture of it. She had blue eyes! Her eyes are normally green. They turn out brown in photos because of a brown starburst she has in the center of her pupils. Sometimes they are greener than other days and in person they are way greener than in a photo but today.. they were as blue as blue could be. As most babies she did have blue eyes when she was born but I have not seen her with blue eyes since she was around 2 years old. I didn’t have my good camera so unfortunately I did not capture how blue they were but this will give you an idea:
After lunch she wanted to play. Not with her toys though, she wanted to play in the sprinkler with her scuba gear that she got the day before from Grandbob.
Side Note: we have this bathing suit, it looked cute on the hanger.. it is not cute. She does not go anywhere in it.. but it being her birthday, I let her wear what she wanted.. it isn’t flattering, it doesn’t fit, it isn't a good color, and honestly I have no idea why I didn’t just get ride of it. But, it was her birthday so what can I do?
Ice Cream Truck:
the annoying ice-cream truck was running late in the neighborhood. {I wish it would just stop coming in the neighborhood, at least it is back down to just once a day} When Zak and Mady heard it, they ran out there like it is the coolest thing in the world. I personally think the guy that drives it is a creep, they have overpriced ice-cream, and the snow cones are the worse snow cones (prepackaged too) every. I do not waste my money on that ice cream truck. It was her birthday though, so they ran out there.
The day came to an end, to be followed by a big day of meeting her new teacher. So we snapped a few last minute birthday pictures before little chica’s 5th birthday ended.
First day of the chore chart
